Comments on: Dreamers (a fragment)

By: selphie_trabia

selphie_trabia — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 05:16:32 +0000

This one fascinates me quite some, I wonder… perhaps they really are in a sort of hell, reliving a cyclical sort of short cycle of death. The same day over and over again.

I wonder if there is a way to break the cycle.

By: Dan Miller

Dan Miller — Thu, 09 Aug 2007 14:56:37 +0000

I really liked the opening sentence–the way it inverts the usual use of that trope. Very smart. I would definitely read more.

By: Sokol

Sokol — Thu, 09 Aug 2007 06:22:08 +0000

Entertaining, makes me want to know more…but at the same time, I like the ending style. Very nice as usual.

By: Eric A. Burns

Eric A. Burns — Wed, 08 Aug 2007 16:05:09 +0000

It’s far from unique. There’s a story or two I think it works well for. I think in this case (remember, I don’t actually remember writing this thing) the idea was the kind of dream logic jumpcutting you mentioned in your comment.

By: Lunatic Muse

Lunatic Muse — Wed, 08 Aug 2007 16:00:01 +0000

I’ll add to the consensus thus far – good place to end it, but also an excellent place to start. (And Michael seems a much more sympathetic protagonist than Thomas Covenant, who was the first thing to spring to mind at the twist.)

I don’t read nearly enough fiction these days; is it a common convention to cut abruptly from one scene to the next without transition, or is that unique to your style? I still find it a bit jarring, but it seemed to work well in the context of this story – some dreams have the same habit. (Whereas mine tend to have segues…)

By: Matt Buchwald

Matt Buchwald — Wed, 08 Aug 2007 14:11:19 +0000

Yup, that works as an ending spot. The kind of ending spot that makes me want more. More! If you felt like fleshing it out more, I’d definitely read.

By: LurkerWithout

LurkerWithout — Wed, 08 Aug 2007 08:49:02 +0000

Reminds me of some of Neil Gaiman’s 80s stuff (no surprise there). But also the zero issue for Astro City where the Hanged Man is visiting people who dream of loved ones who stopped exsisting after one of those giant time altering cross-over things…

By: goblinpaladin

goblinpaladin — Wed, 08 Aug 2007 07:09:53 +0000

While I can agree with the others aesthetically, I really do want to know what happens next. On the theme of dreams blending with the real world, you may appreciate this.

By: MasonK

MasonK — Wed, 08 Aug 2007 05:45:07 +0000

Wow. You never mentioned this one to me, that I recall, but from the names, I can certainly place the era. :) And agreed with #1, that’s a perfect place to end it.

By: Polychrome

Polychrome — Wed, 08 Aug 2007 05:05:55 +0000

That actually seems like a pretty good place to end it, if you ask me. I like it.